Hayley Ellis: Stop Showing Off... 2027

Fast forward some years later, the fringe has flopped and the only gloves she wears is an oven mitt. But what if she'd made it? Who would she be today?

A well-adjusted mum who invested wisely and does the school run? A wellness guru flogging labia flavoured incense sticks?

Or a washed-up has been calling the paps every time she goes to the Tesco just so she can scream "Why won't you people let me live my life!? "